Generosity is an interesting beast. As a charity CEO, I have seen it expressed in many different ways. The best kind of generosity comes with warmth and good old NSA – no strings attached. This kind of generosity is glorious to witness and is the backbone of charity work all over the world. The worst kind smacks you over the head with their husband’s cheque book.
I wrote a whole chapter about kindness and another on charity in my latest book, but I have continued to wonder about the ‘why’ of generosity. Why do some people give with nothing expected in return, even when they don’t have much themselves? Why do others use it to wield control and command kudos?
So I do what I always do when I don’t understand why people behave the way they do and I consult the neuroscientific research.
The origins of human generosity go back to when knuckle-draggers evolved into hunter-gatherers. Survival of the species relied on a herd mentality of care where older, fitter humans helped younger, slower, cuter ones. Those who didn’t participate in sharing or self-sacrifice for the herd were removed by natural selection. I wish stingy bastards in 2019 were the same: removed by natural selection.
Nature and nurture
According to science, humans are a combination of nature and nurture when it comes to generosity. The brain rewards you with a shot of feel-good dopamine when you are generous. That delicious hormone literally sizzles through your bloodstream when you take your imaginary generosity gland for a whirl. It is a biological boomerang: give to someone who needs it and the joy will bounce right back at you as a warm fuzzy feeling of reward and delight.
Humans employ two things when they are assessing whether to be generous: logic and empathy. The distraction of the decision-making part of the brain causes people to be more generous. Logic introduces an assessment of benefit and loss for giver and receiver. If the giver sees they can make a difference to the receiver without any significant loss to themselves, we have a winner in the logical generosity department!
Why so stingy?
So what makes a stingy bastard? Or worse, someone who is generous for all the wrong reasons. It seems to be the work of the nature/nurture/values trifecta. All three of which are done and dusted by the time humans are young adults. Meet an older person who lacks generosity and you really can’t convince them to repave their neural tendencies and nurtured behaviours with values of generosity and welfare. Unless you can appeal to their ego.
If you are born with less neural empathy (nature) than the next guy, you will be less likely to give. But that part of your brain is not fully developed until humans are 30. This explains why teenagers can be such breathtakingly selfish creatures. Teen brains lack neural empathy.
Article written by LUCY BLOOM and subscribe to our Podcast Channel
Connection with someone takes more than common interests of What Makes People Click. It also takes this. Do you know who created the world’s first social network? It wasn’t Zuckerberg, Dorsey, or Tom from MySpace. It was the person who kindled the first fire. The fire’s loud crackling, billowing smoke, and beautiful orange glow attracted others […]
People love to talk about #1 PSYCHOLOGICAL SAFETY. It’s defined as a belief that it’s okay to speak up with ideas, questions, or concerns without fear of negative consequences. I love this concept. We need more of it in practice. It speaks to the contextual foundation for creativity and innovation. However, it’s in short supply in many workplaces. I think I […]
In the wake of some of the recent Force for Good events in the world and in light of so much of what we’ve all been through the past few years, I’ve been finding it challenging to focus on the good stuff and Be a Force for Good, even though this is at the core […]
The Unseen Turbulence: How Aviation Keynote Speakers Can Navigate the Industry’s Workforce Crisis The aviation industry has long been a symbol of human ingenuity, progress, and ambition. Yet beneath its sleek exterior and technological marvels lies a crisis that few are willing to discuss openly. A severe workforce shortage is threatening the foundation of the […]
Over the last year as You Want to Be an Authentic Leader, you’ve worn countless sweatshirts on Zoom calls, taken meetings while walking, and even brought Fido, your adorable Shih Tzu, into a few calls. Well done. However, and I hate to break it to you, that doesn’t necessarily make you an “authentic leader”. The […]
I recently stayed at a five-star hotel and found a major marketing problem lurking in the wardrobe in my room and then realised everything you do is marketing Upon check-in I was welcomed enthusiastically, and my membership status recognised with a room upgrade. I was even presented with a welcome gift to thank me […]
In the ever-evolving landscape of LGBTQ Keynote Speakers 2024, public speaking, keynote addresses serve as powerful platforms for individuals to share their stories, insights, and expertise. Over the years, the LGBTQ community has seen a rise in representation within this realm, with speakers transcending barriers and advocating for inclusivity, diversity, and acceptance. As we delve […]
You cave to peer pressure and put your name in a contest to riding the bull. Suddenly – you win! What was a joke and dare moments before, you now see your name on the rodeo board, everyone is freaking out with excitement because you were chosen, and the exhilaration quickly turns to dread. This […]
Our Mission:
© All rights reserved 2025. Designed using Voxel
